Emotional Mastery: Business, Relationships, and Life

One wrong move and everything you’ve been working for could fall into pieces.

The promotion you’ve been waiting for is gone because of an outburst of anger.

The person you’ve been dating could leave you because of your fear of commitment.

You could be stuck your whole life because of your inability to deal with sadness.

These emotions, these feelings.

Everyone feels emotions. Some of us are better at hiding them than others. Some of us turn to other avenues to express our emotions. Someone dealing with anger issues could use the gym to reduce and let out his emotions. A man could see other women to counteract his feelings of fear when it comes to commitment. You could turn to alcohol or drugs to deal with your emotions of sadness.

Cheap. A cheap way out.

Easy. An easy way out.

Like most of society.

Who’s at fault here?

How lazy interpretation leads to suffering

We learn at an early age that circumstances dictate our emotions. That if we watch a sad movie, we get sad. If we are stuck in traffic, we get mad. If we do well on an exam in school, we are happy.

Zoom out.

These waves of emotions are what steer us toward a direction in life. The more happiness felt, the more we are willing to walk in that direction. The more negative emotion, the more we walk away.

From our past, we see this as a result of our need for survival.

• Our need for the safety around us.

• Our need to be accepted in society.

• Our need to be free from worry.

Consciousness is not something we are born with it is something we develop.

People who lack awareness believe they have all the awareness they could need.

If you believe you have it all figured out, then you do. If you feel like there is still more room for growth, then you have more room for growth.

Neither is right, as neither is wrong.

How To Master & Control Your Emotions

Thought pattern —> Filter —> Emotion

• How do I know what is wrong if everything around me seems okay?

• How do I know what to believe when everyone around me is doing it this way?

• Who will I turn to if things do not work out?

Recognize the possibility for growth in every situation. This illusion of a perfect life is preventing you from fixing the issues that need fixing. Situations around you do not need an emotional response. The only time an emotional response is appropriate is when combined with logic.

If one’s survival needs are sufficient, the need to feel the emotion of fear disappears.

If one has found success in the materialistic world, success is now fueling one's emotions.

But to get to that place, the individual had to pursue the accomplishment of a task.

We often think that we lack control of the world around us. As a result, we conform to the thinking that we lack control over ourselves. It is when we find control of our focus that we are able to control our emotions.

Event —> [( Thought pattern —> Filter —> Emotion)] —> Behavior

We may not have control of the external world. But we always have the choice by which we respond to it. It is the reason we are able to dance in the rain and smile throughout the storms. It is in knowing that the sun always rises, as we create our own sun.

How expectations ruin performance

Anticipation dictates emotion.

When we expect an event as being good or bad, we gain an emotional response.

Most people are in a reactive state, using the circumstances around them to shape their emotional well-being.

Control the controllable.

People are too quick to act rather than to reflect. It has become a habit, the wrong kind.

Creating a filter allows for the creation of a new thought pattern.

A thought process that brings awareness to the right response, habit, and structure.

We are a product of our habits.

Choose the wrong kind and you have a decreasing asset.

Structure the right kind and you can compound.

Until next time my friend. - Paolo

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